Monday, June 28, 2010

Random Thoughts From the Ghetto-Volume 30

I look out my window and see the empty 40 oz beer bottles, hypodermic needles, crack pipes and abandoned shopping carts on my front lawn and begin to think. The end results have become known as my random thoughts from the ghetto...

-Whatever happened to the leashes with the invisible dogs? Those things were funny. I have a feeling they will be making a comeback soon just like the "Baby on Board" signs did a few years ago.

-The last few weeks of school were certainly tough weather wise. It was 80 degrees with no air conditioning. One kid told me "my pits stunk". Another said I had bad breathe. I heard a third student ask a female teacher if she knew she was getting fat. I wish the kids today would open up more and tell us what is really on their minds.

-Noco is putting in a drive thru for their new Mighty Taco restaurant. Don't take a sharp turn or you might end up in the Buffalo River. A better idea would be for the gas station itself to have a drive thru. Then, all the fat slobs wouldn't have to walk inside to get their beer, blunts, cigarettes, or lottery tickets.

-I was driving the other day and I pulled up to one of those tiny cars at a red light. I said, is that one of those smart cars? The driver said, "yes it is. Are you one of those dumb drivers?"

-It's always funny when someone gets mauled and nearly killed by a wild animal. They always say they don't hold any resentment towards the animal, saying "that is just what wild bears do when they get nervous and feel scared." I wish one time they would interview a survivor who would say, "I do hold resentment towards the animal. It ruined my life and I hope it becomes extinct soon."

-The Gus Macker has come and gone for another year. Police report several arrests for disorderly conduct, involving unruly fans. Parents of the fans are upset and say their children need to be allowed to stay at the courts, regardless of their behavior. Organizers will set up a court inside the grounds next year for teenagers who don't know how to act in public. The delinquents will receive two hours of free throw instruction followed by counseling, to find out the reasons for their poor conduct.

-They say a good entertainer always leaves people wanting more. That said, when people finish reading this blog, they say they'd rather have less.

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