Friday, September 14, 2012

Don't blame me-I voted for Sweaty Betty

 Tim Kennedy (pictured above) almost pulled a choke job of Jim Keanelike proportions, but escaped with a narrow victory over Betty Jean"the Professor" Grant. Voters can now look forward to Brian Higgins' 300 lb. blow-up doll butchering the English language, eating everything in sight, and making a fool of himself for at least one more term. 

I'm surprised at the number of people who were genuinely shocked at the close race between Tim Kennedy and Betty Jean Grant. People on Twitter were all commenting on how they thought 
Kennedy was supposed to win handily. They don't know what most people in the neighborhood know-Kennedy is TERRIBLE and should be mopping floors at WalMart.

Usually, politicians are encouraged to get on television and speak in front of large groups. My advice to Tim would be to do exactly the opposite. The last thing he wants is for people to know who he is. Trust me. Up until now, he's relied on an Irish last name and the backing of Brian Higgins to win elections. However, the more people see and hear him, the more they say, "That buffoon is our state senator?" My advice to Kennedy would be to pull a "Bill Stachowski" and hide out for the next two years. In fact, whatever he does, he shouldn't attempt to speak in public. In fact, if I were him, I would try to convince people I was the former Buffalo Sabre of the same name. At least that guy can put two sentences together. Anything beats the truth in this case. The more people realize how incompetent Kennedy is, the sooner this neverending practical joke will come to its merciful conclusion.

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