From the we saw this coming department: George Rekers, whose national group helps "convert" homosexuals to become straight, was recently found to have taken a trip with an escort named Lucien, whom he met at a site called Rentboy.com (actual website). He says he is not gay and that he hired Lucien only to "carry his luggage." While there are a million jokes I could tell involving this phrase, I won't lower myself to relaying them here.
Another guy calling a press conference to tell us he's not gay. One rule of thumb: if you're calling a press conference to tell us you're not gay, you are gay. One needs only to look at the state trooper/porn star mustache on this guy to see he is a classic Village Person