Monday, January 14, 2013
Big Mouth no longer a pirate
You know it's 2013 when a Somali pirate calls an international press conference to announce he is retiring from the business...
At a press conference—possibly the first to be held by a retiring pirate—Mohamed Abdi Hassan, known as "Afweyne" or "big mouth," told reporters on Wednesday that after eight successful years in the business, he’s through.
The king-pin pirate was described by the United Nations as "one of the most notorious and influential leaders." The New York Times described his arrival on the scene as bringing a “new sophistication” to the business, noting, “Afweyne raised venture capital for his pirate operations as if he were launching a Wall Street I.P.O.”
When asked to describe his greatest career achievement Afweyne scowled "Arrr! When me drank some grog and got me the scurvy!"
Big Mouth said he was looking forward to spending more time with his family and following his favorite sports teams, you guessed it-the Pittsburgh Pirates and Tampa Bay Buccaneers...