Sunday, September 18, 2011

Wack pack's NFL picks: week two

Last month, the blog was read in all 50 states and 99 countries. For some reason, it's very popular in California and the Philippines (???). But, when I went looking for people to pick NFL games, I looked no further than South Buffalo, NY. I found three current residents and one who recently moved after living here for 45 years.

Buddy the Bookie from Amherst...

Famous quotes- "Get them before they get you."
"Go Bills. And take the Sabres with you."

Buddy, a former mainstay on the Art Wander show, now lives in a gated community in Amherst. (Actually, he has a three foot, broken gate in front of his house.) For tomorrow's games, he likes Houston, Kansas City, Tennessee, the Bills, and Hotlanta.

The Ninja
Famous Quote- "I have risen!"

The only thing the ninja likes more than fine food and beautiful women (in that order) is football. A former member of the Witness Protection Program, the South Buffalo legend is not only known in local gambling circles. His fame and notoriety spread as far away as Las Vegas, where he is known to more than a few unsavory characters from their Italian American community. This week, the ninja has reached into his sword to pick Oakland, Philadelphia, New England, Detroit, and Seattle. He says, if he doesn't go at least 3-2, he'll "swallow his sword". (Since I'm afraid to even know what that means, I'm hoping he goes 5-0.)

The rooster (with help from a man named MacGavis).

Famous Quote- "It's not cheating. It's improvising to win."

When he's not exposing corruption in City Hall or running benefits for people long since forgotten by others, the rooster has been known to scout football games. For this task, he employed the help of a man he called the greatest prognosticator of our generation, South Buffalo's MacGavis. The rooster said the two would be watching tomorrow's games at their respective homes, mentioning something about ankle bracelets preventing them from going to Talty's.

As for their picks, the rooster likes New Orleans (-6.5). He says MacGavis likes their takeaway abilities on defense(which he thinks they learned from the Hurricane Katrina looters). The rooster and his counterpart like the Bills (-3) over Oakland, despite the Bills perceived problems at stopping the run. Mac's favorite's of the week are the Miami Dolphins, based solely on the fact that he ate Mahi Mahi (dolphin fish) the other day. The rooster likes the Detroit Lions (his NFC championship pick (-8) over Kansas City, a team some feel might have trouble beating South Park High School. For their big underdog pick, the rooster and MacGavis are choosing San Diego over the hated New England Patriots. That pick takes a lot of guts. They don't think pretty boy Brady will make it through the game in one piece.

Finally, the rooster and his counterpart are predicting Timon's luck will run out next week when they take on the Wilson Lakemen. They are predicting Wilson by 13! I don't know about that one. I'm pretty sure Wilson is a smaller school. I have to give credit to Timon and their new coaches. They're 3-0 with two of their victories coming over Monsignor Martin opponents. I know O'Hara and St. Mary's are not Canisius or St. Joe's, but a win is a win in my book. And they've won decisively. From what I hear, the lacrosse player from Timon (not sure his name) is a very good running back.

Personally, I'm not in the same league as these four legends. However, I'm liking Buffalo today at home. I'm predicting a huge season for Fred Jackson and I like Merrimen and the new Defensive Lineman they drafted (Marcell Dareus) I also like Fitzpatrick's composure and intelligence in the pocket, which he must have learned studying at Harvard with Congressman Brian Higgins. And Jackson is very good in pass protection, in my opinion. I predict they will win by 7 points with Roland Hooks scoring a TD late in the 4th quarter.

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